Why You Need to Break Your Own Rules

Image: Julia Caesar, Unsplash

We set ourselves goals, make incredible plans, set our agenda, list our actions for the day, and somehow, we feel all set to get going.

But, you wake up, and your heart or body is telling you a different story. 

It says, "sleep more", "go the park instead", "go walk by the sea", "do NOTHING".

But often, we resist, because we feel obliged to the plans we've made for ourselves that we "must get done otherwise....". 

What is that consequence you fear if you don't do what you set out to do?

Even when you do urge yourself to sit at your desk, to follow your own plan, you may resist what you thought you must do, as you feel like doing something different.

At times, the best thing to do is follow what your heart and body is telling you to do. 

Listening to your energy levels, and creative urges, so you can give your body what it intuitively needs, or lets you create or live in the moment. (Sometimes that's when I create my best work.)

But notice when that voice that is saying "break your own rules, don't do ...." and the resistance to taking the action you previously thought was helpful or needed, is actually a fear or belief you can't do it.

Notice when that thing you keep putting off, stays on your to-do-list and causes you inner stress, just because you didn't feel like getting it done. When actually, if you'd pushed past the resistance, and committed to just doing it, you'd feel more in control and relieved!

Over the next week, notice if your resistance to taking action falls into one of these 3 rebellions against your own plans or rules:

1. Your heart and body is intuitively telling you what's right for you to do. There might be some resistance in your body, but it feels calm, soft or gentle, and perhaps there's a natural urge or pull to do something else. This can be another type of action or creative piece that wants to be expressed more. It could be your body's way of saying, you need a different type of fuel – more movement, more energy, more rest.

2. You feel your body resisting an action but it's showing up in your body almost like a physical block. You might notice your body experiencing knots in your stomach, a tightness in your chest, or throat, or a heaviness across your shoulders or your jaw is clenched.  It could be in fact based on a self-limiting belief. that perhaps is saying "you can't do it", "it won't be good enough".  Understand what the message is.

3. Your body clock is telling you that your energy or mindset isn't in the right zone for this task. It's important for you to recognise when those times in the day, week or month might be more conducive to you doing your lateral or linear type of work, left-brain versus right-brain activities. Also, notice when other things are getting in the way of your natural body clock (i.e. lack of sleep, dehydration, too much caffeine, distractions).

Now that I can notice the difference between why I'm resisting doing certain tasks, I can choose how to respond to it – do what I feel more compelled to do, reframe the fear, do something to shift my energy, reschedule it at a more appropriate time.

I still get everything I need to do, done, but I'm much more gentle on myself than before.

My diary and to-do list (which I now call "to-love" list) is not designed to police my time here on earth – it's there as a simple framework and guide, to help not hinder. 

I can break my own plans and rules if I want to – as long as it's the best thing for me in that moment.

Notice which rules you've set for yourself you want to break to, but importantly, explore "why".

Love, Marie x

Image: Julia Caesar, Unsplash

Marie Milligan

Marie Milligan, Painted Lady Canalboat, Blomfield Road Moorings, Little Venice, London, UK

I'm the Founder of Wild Women Do, a coaching network and movement for creative, entrepreneurial women needing support to create and launch something inspirational. A Holistic Business Coach, Entrepreneurship Educator and Writer, I love nothing better than helping you release your creative spirit, and get your ideas expressed and done.