I wrote this line and took this photo last year in a time of trauma. Everything I'd known was not as it seemed.
All I could do while the world and global society around me was melting down, and my sense of self and life felt shattered, was to find a way back to my truest self and the life path I needed to have faith I was on.
Journaling was about the only way that I could make sense of who I was in that moment, and what I wanted, and realign to who I was, and who I thought I might have been.
Releasing old stories never shared before and rewriting my vision of my identity and life ahead filled me with a sense of hope, where hope had previously been lost. At this time, I felt I was on the edge of a paradise lost when actually, this diversion back to my real destiny was leading to me towards a real paradise that was waiting for me, all along.
Before I believed in God, I thought I only had my intuition to rely on to guide my way.
Now, I believe that our intuition is an internal magnet but we must also be open to connecting it externally to our destiny. I think of destiny like the matching magnet that pulls us to be who we truly are and go where our souls are meant to be.
The only way I found to realign to that, was to find a way to let go of the resistance in my mind, body and spirit and outer life experience that was causing any internal and external pain.
Through weekly psychology sessions, the complex PTSD symptoms started to settle: the daily grounding and meditation practices started to ease my worried mind, the new ability to self-soothe, was a balm of tender touch on my emotional wounds. The simplicity of a few healthy ingredients on a small plate started to nourish my depleted body until my taste returned.
More than ever before, I felt an urgency to get well, to rebuild my strength, to reawaken my Wild Woman again, who had been suffocated and smothered with the narcissistic desires and demands of a man whose story was far from true.
The reveal of a chronic painful past, of trauma from childhood into my twenties and beyond, was not one I was ready for, but one, that I finally had to face, even though I was at my weakest to cope with it all, than I'd ever been.
Through the dark came a renewed light. I felt awakened to the beauty of life, to the gift that is our self, and a full understanding that we are here, for a purpose, to create and contribute.
Why else would we be here?
Why else do we have a wisdom and skills to share?
We were born as an act of creation, and it is not our place to stifle that creative evolution and revolution with our dramas and self-doubt.
A man or woman might declare and be told that this is selfish to want this:
"I want to live an empowered, wild and wonderful life. I want to spend my time creating my ideas and pouring my wisdom into creations that will nourish me and inspire others. I want to earn and contribute to society with my creativity and my compassion, and my power to heal."
Why would this desire and wild declaration to stand up for who they are and what they want to create, be any less valuable than if they had declared;
"I want to live an ordinary and simple life, spending my time serving and supporting the ideas and wisdom of another creator or entrepreneur's business. I want to contribute to my family and society with my non-creative skills."
The world needs a balance of people with different skills, strengths and mindsets but they are all valuable, they all matter, and that includes the creators and the creative thinkers.
The awakening last year stirred up the fire within me to help other creative and entrepreneurial women who've been lost and suffering, to know it is time to change your story and to wake up and step-up.
The sooner you realign your life and business with your heart and your art, the faster you will see results for you and others that bring daily joy.
WILD WOMAN, I INVITE YOU TO WAKE UP FROM YOUR SILENT RETREAT.
We know that you have been hurt, have healed, and been hurt again, and most likely will in future too. But next time, you will have the inner and outer strength to carry on. We all do.
It is time for you to realign your one life with the woman you know yourself to be.
To say 'yes' to creating and practising your craft daily.
To repurpose your message in your business so your working days are a soulful sanctuary where you are caring and contributing from your heart, and your art, and your healing hands.
What's it going to take to realign?
Do what it takes to shake off the shadows, and lift your face and heart up to the light. To hear the sound of your intuition and to connect with your faith and destiny.
If it takes a daily visit to the therapist or the gym, a trip to the comedy club, a daily call with your mum or best friend, a chance to escape to the woods, or surfing in the ocean, or a retreat in a log cabin for a month with your love, or a coaching program where you are fully supported back to realignment, just do what you need to do to reconnect with the Wild Woman you.
Free yourself of the resistance within you and the fear that is based on old stories. Open up to tuning into the resonance within and around you.
Feel that destiny magnet that is waiting for you, pulling you to take a step towards the wild and wonderful life path you are meant to be on.
You might learn that you are actually where you were supposed to be, with who you are meant to be with when you choose to quieten the noise within.
You need no-one's permission but yours, to give yourself what you need to realign and heal.
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