How to Find Your Wild Side

I was recently sent an email via this site from an inspiring woman named Megan Goudy, a student at a college in South Carolina, USA. She's taking a Women's Literature class and for her final project, she's chosen the topic of the Wild Woman after reading Women Who Run with the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estes. Her exploration is 'who they are, why they matter, and how to become one.'

She wrote to ask me,

 
What do you think is the single most important thing a woman can do to find her own wild side?
— Megan Goudy
 

Not only was I inspired by her topic but her willingness to connect and ask for my view. It actually struck a chord and rather than a one sentence response, I crafted this spontaneous blog post as my reply. As you can see, this topic is one close to my heart and what I stand for in Wild Women Do! If you've 10 minutes to spare, get yourself a cuppa and take a read. 

*****

Her wild side was never lost, in order to be found, she simply needs to reconnect with it. A woman will find her wild side when she listens in. If she stops searching for it externally, she'll find that version of herself within. When she quietens her mind and reconnects with her whole body and soul, she will sense and feel who she is at her core.

As an adult Wild Woman, she will reconnect with her wild side when she gives herself permission to play again. Give herself time to discover, to explore all the characters and versions of herself. Also, travels outside her comfort zone, out in the wild world.

She will find her when she takes time for herself, does what feels good and nourishes her. When she embraces life and decides to be in the moment. Relishing and savouring it all. Letting go of stress, fear or worry.

She can only do that, guilt free, when she decides to love all versions of herself – the fearless and the frightened – and believe in herself and what she is capable of, no matter what limiting beliefs have formed along her life journey.

A woman will know she can and often does play many characters in her life stemming from her personality, but also influenced by who she is with, where she is, and how she is feeling at the time.

Her wild side is no doubt, the character that represents (at the times she plays her), the freer version of self, the woman who is courageous, bold, brave, daring, strong, resilient, and allows herself to take risks. She champions her values of independence, freedom, courage, creativity, curiosity, fun, joy, exploration, discovery and truth.

She will recognise her wild side, as the part of herself that shares the values that were perhaps true for her as a young child before any influence got in the way. As a child, she would have (we hope) embraced these values and explored and played with abandon because she was fearless, she was light, and most of all, she was self-loving. She didn't yet know any other way to be or feel.

If she acted in a way that was non-conformist, she might have found she was labelled “naughty” or “disobedient”, or a "wild child”; wild representing the value of rebellious or disrespectful here. In fact, she was representing her version of freedom, independence, courage, resilience, curiosity, creativity, fun, bravery, and so, on.

As she grew, she listened to views or opinions of others and started to form beliefs about herself, whether truth or a perspective. She was taught how she must live or what she must do to belong (or in most instances, to be ‘kept safe’ and conform). She made a decision how to be and how to act based on the belief system she accepted as ‘truth’.

This catalyst point in her self-development may have lead to the wilder, more authentic version of herself being tamed down, quietened or hidden in some way. She somehow found herself living a life less colourful, confined by social or familial boundaries. Until the moment she has an awakening.

In my experience, at the extreme cases, it’s often at a break-down or traumatic time where the pain of not loving yourself or the life you’re performing becomes unbearable. You know change must happen or you feel your will to live or your wild soul will die.

There’ll be that moment she says, ‘times up’ on self-doubt, on hiding by playing a passive character in a life she doesn’t want, directed by someone else’s vision or rules.

She will feel awakened that she must seek out her truth and see the world with a fresh perspective.

She will decide "enough is enough" and take a course of development to realign to her true self, and the life and career path she always wanted.

When ready, she will once again, know who she is and trust she can "take a walk on the wild side” without losing stability or respectability. Quite the opposite.

When a woman finds her wild side, reconnects with her Wild Woman and walks her truth, she is an example of a woman who is loving and is living without regret.

What in the world might be different then?

What is the single most important thing a woman can do to find her wild side? Megan and I would love to hear your thoughts below.

Love, Marie 

 
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Marie Milligan

Marie Milligan, Painted Lady Canalboat, Blomfield Road Moorings, Little Venice, London, UK

I'm the Founder of Wild Women Do, a coaching network and movement for creative, entrepreneurial women needing support to create and launch something inspirational. A Holistic Business Coach, Entrepreneurship Educator and Writer, I love nothing better than helping you release your creative spirit, and get your ideas expressed and done.